Reflections on Fifth CI Anniversary

By Dale Oftebro

Editor: Every cochlear implant (CI) user has a story, and they're all informative and interesting. Occasionally a one takes the time to write her story, so the rest of us can benefit. Dale Oftebro did just that on the fifth anniversary of her hookup, and she graciously agreed to share her story with our readers.

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Remembering

Today I was remembering - remembering nearly 50 years of hearing virtually nothing, and then remembering August 22, 2001 - 5 years ago today - the day my cochlear implant was activated and I entered a world of sound that was new and strange and interesting and wonderful.

I remember - frequently asking, "What is that sound?" Now - I still ask, but not as often, and can sometimes figure out for myself what a sound is and from where it is coming.

I remember - sounds of voices that had no words. Now - I hear bits of conversation, my granddaughter calling me from the back seat, the babbling of my grandson, my name being called from across the street, the grocery clerk telling me to "have a good day", my husband's wonderful laugh.

I remember - the radio in the car being nothing but noise. Now - I hear snippets of advertisements, the beat of the music, and recognize some of the carols at Christmas time. One of the greatest joys for me of being able to "hear" continues to be music. It's been such a pleasure to buy CD's and find music and musicians I'm best able to hear. I've discovered that country gospel is what I enjoy most - their instrumental arrangements are easier for my brain to process than the music of orchestras or the piano, and the deep voices of Randy Travis, George Jones and Ernie Ford are my current favorites.

I remember - going out on a busy street and hearing nothing - my brain wasn't able to process the noise. Now - I hear cars on the street; I'm able to be cautious if I hear one coming at a blind corner as I walk. I hear airplanes and helicopters, lawnmowers and rakes, the pounding of hammers and barking of dogs, skateboards and scooters clacking over the sidewalk, leaves crunching underfoot.

I remember - being amazed at the sound of running water, light switches clicking, ice clinking and paper rustling. Now - I'm able to hear the lid on a pot of boiling water jiggling, and know to turn the heat down, hear the microwave and coffeepot beep "done", the ice dropping from the icemaker, the sound of something dropping on the floor, the ironing board squeaking, doors closing, the chime of the doorbell and ringing phones - everywhere!

I remember - hearing the sound of footsteps and flip-flops slapping. Now - I hear high heels clicking, runners coming up behind me on the street, the burrs in my shoes clicking on the sidewalk until I remove them, the dog panting as he walks beside me, the birds with their different trills and warbles, the cawing of crows and screech of seagulls, the wind blowing through the trees.

I remember - that all the "noise" didn't bother me as I "listened", since I was still relying solely on lip reading to "hear" speech. Now - I find noise at parties or gatherings challenging and tiring, as I've come to rely more and more on what I actually hear to supplement my lip reading. Without my CI, attempting to lip read is a challenge - a skill I had spent a lifetime perfecting is now difficult.

I remember - being told not to expect to understand speech without lip reading. Now - my latest tests show I'm hearing about 70% of sentences without lip reading in "ideal" conditions, in quiet surroundings with someone speaking clearly. Never having a reason to listen, learning to do so is a skill I'm still working to develop.

I remember - always needing to be alert and aware of what was going on around me, never sure if I'd not responded to someone speaking to me, wondering if I'd set off the security alarm as I was leaving a store, watching the door for visitors or repairmen, or having to leave the door unlocked, looking both ways and sideways every time I crossed the street. Now - I'm more relaxed, knowing I'll hear someone speaking to me, the store alarm, the doorbell, the dog barking to warn of someone at the door, the sound of cars on the street.

I remember - having to look up every few seconds at church to be sure I was still singing on tempo or at the right place in the liturgy. Now - I can sing and follow the music without having to look up, even find my place in the hymn if I come in late; follow the liturgy and lessons without looking at the speaker; listen to prayers with my eyes closed, able to contemplate what is being said or sung and not be distracted by having to watch for the end of the song or the prayer - afraid I'll be standing when everyone else is sitting down.

I remember - two months into my hearing journey feeling that if what I was hearing at that time was all I would be able to hear, it would be enough. Now - I have so much more! Although I don't discover new sounds daily as I did at first, I find that as time passes I'll hear something and think, "I don't remember hearing that before". Two summers ago I noticed the sound of crickets - very persistent, very annoying! I also realized I could hear the security alarm going off at the library, as well as the "beep" when I scanned the barcode to check books in or out. I've noticed I can now hear the wind chimes in the backyard, even through an open window. Last year on this date I had the wonderful privilege of hearing the newborn cries of our grandson, Kyle, shortly after he was born, a memory I've stored away and continue to treasure.

My granddaughter, Kaitlynn, is now 5, and on a recent visit when I got out of the shower, I found my headpiece had been pushed under the door - she already understands that Grandma can't hear without it. A few days ago when we were visiting to celebrate Kyle's first birthday, we were together early in the morning and she asked me, "Grandma, are you connected?" When I assured her I was, she proceeded to begin a conversation - what a blessing.

How do you say "thank you" for the amazing gift of hearing? How do you measure the joy of hearing the voices of loved ones as well as strangers; the sense of security in knowing there's a car coming or the warning of a dog barking; the gift of confidence that comes with the ability to communicate with people who are difficult to lip read; the enjoyment of music both in listening and in dancing? I never imagined that modern technology, research and surgical techniques would work together to give me the life changing ability to enjoy the world of sound.

Finally, I remember - in 1962, in eighth grade, I wrote and gave a speech titled, "The World I See Through My Eyes". The opening sentence was, "The world I see through my eyes is a beautiful but silent world". Now - I not only see, I hear. God continues to perform miracles.